To Clean Or Not To Clean

Last week I was unwillingly bitten by the Spring-Cleaning Bug and I’ve been feeling it’s effects ever since. Cleaning, for me, is a battle of extremes where there is no middle ground. I am either not cleaning, or I’m on my knees cursing the new sponge I bought that is too bulky to clean the tiny crevices in my baseboards.

Now my kitchen counter is neatly lined with every cleaning product that caught my obsessive eye over the past couple weeks. It’s quite a sight. Many-textured sponges for various purposes (dishes, bathtub, walls, baseboards), three spot treatments for my carpet (in case two don’t work or I decide to use them all together), trash bags (scented and unscented), probably every Swiffer product on the market….the

list goes on.  I stood in one Wal-Mart aisle for ten minutes agonizing whether I should purchase the Pledge furniture polish specifically for “dust and allergens” or the one labeled “Protection Plus.” Would it be prudent to get both, and use one after the other? Or were they actually the exact same product in different colored aerosol cans? I must have looked upset because a Wal-Mart employee snuck up behind me and quietly asked if I was okay. Startled, I barked that I was fine and snatched the blue can, deciding it would at least add a pop of color under my kitchen sink. It seemed logical at the time, but now I wonder what future houseguest will investigate my cupboards then compliment me on the cheery color palette of my cleaning products.

Regardless of my personal oddities, spring cleaning is a national phenomenon that cannot be ignored. Google the phrase and you’ll find tips on how to get started, get your family involved, organize a garage sale, and make your own cleaning products. “Spring cleaning” even has it’s own Wikipedia page. But despite all this, spring cleaning does not have a definitive origin.

It’s been suggested that before the vacuum cleaner, spring was the best time to dust because windows could be opened for air circulation but insects were not yet a an issue. Also, the days are longer and provide more daylight by which to see the true horror of your mess. Jewish Passover falls in either March or April and the house is traditionally cleaned and rid of all leavened bread (including crumbs). During the Chinese New Year it is time to physically sweep out bad luck and misfortune. My favorite, by far, credits spring cleaning to the Dark Ages when livestock would be brought inside the house to keep from freezing and put back out to pasture when it became warmer. If livestock in the house doesn’t warrant a good cleaning, I don’t know what does.

I have never kept livestock in my apartment but I’m sitting here looking at the plethora of cleaning products crowding my kitchen counter, and I think I’d have enough to do damage if a herd of cows had spent a winter here. Thankfully, for now it’s just me….and the baseboards.

Related posts:

1. Well, At Least The Carpet Is Clean