Photographed for the 2010 Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue in tiny bra-and-panty-like bikinis, snowboarder Hannah Teter looks kind of like a deer, a hot deer, caught in headlights. In one photo she appears to be on the verge of masturbating. Teter said she had a blast on the photo shoot, and even her brother was able to deal with pictures of his sexy sister. She donated the proceeds to her charity, which provides aid to the Kenyan town of Kirindon. Other female Olympic athletes appeared in the magazine with Teter, including snowboarder Clair Bidez and skiers Lacy Schnoor and Lindsey Vonn. It’s all win-win: Female snowboarders gain confidence by getting recognized for their sexy in addition to their skill, guys get to look at beautiful, athletic women, and a town in Kenya gets clean water. What’s not to love?
Here’s my qualm: had a photo of near-masturbating Hannah Teter surfaced on the internet, and had it not been taken by a professional photographer and published in a national magazine, wouldn’t she get raked over the coals for something like “not being a true Olympic role model?” Like, oh I don’t know, snowboarder Scotty Lago? He agreed to go home before he got kicked out of the Olympic village this week for photographs taken after he won his bronze medal, which were published on gossip website TMZ. Photographs, I might add, where he wasn’t near-naked or about to masturbate. One of the pictures featured the bronze medal hung around his waist; a woman kneeled in front of him and kissed it. In another photo she was shown suggestively biting the medal.
Can someone please explain to me the difference between Teter and Lago? The media seems to overwhelmingly support Teter’s pictures, but public sentiment is mixed on Lago. Some cite his right to be a guy and celebrate after an Olympic win, but others argue that he poorly represented America and deserved to be sent home. So he had to apologize for his lewd behavior and say how bad he felt about the incident, and go home with his tail, and his bronze medal, between his legs. In a poll on TMZ, readers were asked if Lago deserved a break, and today 78% of the poll participants said he did. I am totally with them. The only difference between Teter and Lago is that Teter’s pics were posed and snapped by a professional photographer, while Lago was captured out and about in Vancouver, celebrating. I fail to see how the gulf between public perception of these two can be so wide. Really, I’m at a total loss. Maybe if Lago was hotter it would have been taken in stride? What if it had been media-loved Shaun White instead? But no, he was criticized when his coach dropped the f-bomb on live TV. Somehow that was White’s fault too.
Americans are hyper-sensitive about our appearance on the world stage. Our government does controversial things, and often Americans are perceived as fat, clueless morons. It gets to us. So when we get together with the rest of the world, we want our countrymen and women to look absolutely flawless while winning every single gold medal. It’s an unreasonable expectation, as humans are inherently flawed creatures. And I think I just realized what the difference is. Teter appears flawless in the swimsuit issue. We demand perfection, and she is it (although I stand by my comment that her facial expressions in the shoot are very odd). Because Lago’s photos weren’t posed, they weren’t perfect or pre-sanctioned.
So I think we should give Lago another chance. Let’s put that bad boy in Playgirl and recreate the medal-biting scene. Add the right lighting, a world renowned photographer, some airbrushing and cameras good enough for NASA, and it will be totally appropriate and acceptable. I’m waiting, Playgirl. Time to step up to the plate and bring it home for America.
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About the Author
Kristine Empire is a narcissistic freelance writer in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. She likes vintage clothes, kills every plant she touches, has a phobia of grocery stores, enjoys getting shout-outs on college radio, and her favorite city in the world is Prague.
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February 25th, 2010 → 11:13 am @ KristineEmpire
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